‘Batwoman’ 1×05 recap: “Mine is a Long and Sad Tale”

Batwoman Season 1, Episode 5, “Mine is a Long and Sad Tale” Aired Nov. 3, 2019.

What We Talk About When We Talk About Alice…

Quite frankly, this is how we imagine good villains. I mean, the backstory is important to the story, don’t get me wrong. But I’d argue the backstory isn’t everything. Some people go, “well, I’ve had simular experiences and I didn’t turn into that” and that’s valid (about villains in general).

The backstory is the hairspray on an already flawless curl, it’s purpose is to not let it fall flat. And you would think in an episode titled “Mine is a Long and Sad Tale” the villains backstory would be the most interesting part of this episode, but it’s not.

But let’s recap anyway: After Beth falls into the river with her mother she washes up to shore and a man finds her and brings her home. He has a son named Mouse, with a scarred face. He soon locks her up, but she escapes and is able to make a phone call to Jacob. Jacob traces the call to the house, but the man convinces him it was a prank from his son because he can mimic people’s voices. Young Kate goes down stairs where Beth is kept to see if she can find her sister, and she does, but she doesn’t know it. Beth cannot make a sound because the man told her he would kill them if she did. The end?

To me, learning her backstory wasn’t the most interesting part. It was the adventure down the streets of Wonderland. I think I have a fantasy of all good villains going on a roadtrip with the hero. Alice is so dramatic and captivating. You lean a little closer with everything she says. Batwoman wants us to know their villain. They want us to ruminate with her and maybe even love her?

You start to ask what is she going to do now that she’s retelling this information.

Well, she could bring us to her table with an ice bucket and a bottle of gin. Or, she could take us to dinner.

Stray Musings:

  • Yes, Mary! Kate does need to appreciate you more.
  • Jacob finally accepted who Alice is and that’s great.
  • Kate and Sophie’s kink is hushing them by putting their finger on their mouth.
  • In Gotham, there is naturally someone stealing the skin off of dead bodies.
  • Am I supposed to like Mouse?
  • Please continue to creep me out, Batwoman.

You can catch all new episodes of Batwoman, Sundays at 8 PM on The CW!



Lynsey is a proud Hufflepuff. Find her watching anything from BoJack Horseman to Grey's Anatomy. She loves to read... especially if it features dragons and a good cry. If you ask her what she's doing she will most likely respond "I probably should be writing." Find her on Twitter, to theorize, geek out, and to obsess about Olicity.

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